Sometimes you just feel empty inside. You know those days when it rains and the sky is grey and you feel like there is a hole in your chest. Today’s like that. I’m emotionally frozen.
You can pretend as long as you want that everything is ok but sometimes it’s just too much. And you want to sleep. Till the storm is over. Your warm bed and your mom who tells you “you’ll be ok”. A simple hug so the ice inside melts away and the scars heal. That’s all I need right now.
But those are the things I’ll never get. Because tears are weakness and weakness is not good. At least that’s what they tell me all the time.
Funny how terribly hurt you can get. How the fact that someone cares about you or pretends to can kill you inside. I wish I was more honest sometimes instead of smiling away the things that really hurt me.
I really need my best friend now but she’s on a schooltrip in some forest, so she can’t use her cellphone. And I could call my other friends up but they can’t do it, they can’t make me smile through all the pain like she does. God bless her…!
So right now Alexandra’s “Before the rain” is on repeat (simply the best sad song ever). And I feel like going to sleep and deleting everything. Because tomorrow is a brand new day.
"No where I can go to regain
Whatever I was before the rain ... "
Much love,
Miss fearless
No comments:
Post a Comment